Gregory Pettigrew (etherial) wrote,
Gregory Pettigrew

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A Matter of Honour

So, I have this strange sense of Honour. Maybe strange isn't the right word. Rigid, perhaps. See, I believe strongly in living up to one's word and meeting one's commitments. That's why it pisses me off so much when I have to rearrange things to spend time with my family. It's not the spending time with my family that pisses me off, it's not even the rearranging, it's that it wasn't important enough to them to schedule more than a month in advance, but it's automatically supposed to be more important to me than something I scheduled months (or, in the case of certain Crossroads sessions, years) in advance.

Crossroads is, in fact, the point of this post. See, for the longest time, Crossroads met the first full weekend of the month. For years, in fact. From my first game (10/02) until this past winter, with little exception, that was when it was. Yeah, sometimes it conflicted with things (like family reunions and Gaming Weekends), but I always knew when it was. Lately, it's been the second full weekend of the month...usually.

Tim wants to run the Cape Codders’ Old Timers' Road Rally. He wants me to navigate. Not someone, me. He knows that I am good with maps and directions, am not insane, and can be alone with him for hours without either of us wanting to kill the other. Problem is, it's on April 8th. April 8th is the first full weekend of April, putting it in prime Crossroads territory. Or what was prime Crossroads territory. The Road Rally has a cap of 40 entrants, so it's Very Important to register early. I begged Vance to give me the date of the next game, repeatedly. With a month before the Rally, not sure if it would conflict with Crossroads, not sure if we would get in, I agreed to Navigate.

This past weekend was Crossroads, a damned good episode, too, from where I sat. There was an accompanying announcement and discussion, that we would be switch-hitting with another game, making the next Crossroads the last game in our Colorado storyline for a while. The next Crossroads being, of course, on April 8th.

So now I have this thing, Crossroads, which is probably my "Second Favorite Thing in the Universe", which has to take a backseat to this other thing I really want to do because of this sense of Honour or Commitment of Primacy or Something. And it's frustrating, not just that I can't do what I want, because I am doing a thing I want, but because I have to choose between two things I really want, but the one I want more is the one that requires breaking my own rules by going back on my word and making Tim find another Navigator at short notice. But what frustrates me most is that I know I'd be more frustrated if I scheduled around Crossroads and it turned out to be another date. I'd make the same decision over again, but I still wouldn't like it.

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