Gregory Pettigrew (etherial) wrote,
Gregory Pettigrew

The Reheated Leftovers of My Tortured Soul

Well, it seems I lost at playing Gother Than Thou at Manray last night.
It was just like a party only
•better decorated
•more expensive
•I couldn't drink
•There was nowhere to have a nice quiet conversation.

Every once in awhile, I'd mindlessly climb onto the dance floor and boogie for awhile.

At least I did met one person. As people were randomly filing out, I heard a familiar voice and it turned out to be Romi - a friend of mine from middle/high school.

Sigh. It really was just a like a party. The more fun I seemed to be having, the more I was ignoring my own loneliness and robotically playing out the role of club/partygoer. I hate crowds. Simply the large group of people serves to remind me that I'm still more alone than anyone can imagine. I'm in so much pain that just never goes away. And nobody notices. Sigh. Maybe it's just cancer or something.

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